Some times, just some times, life throws you a big, juicy gift. Last month when I stumbled across this lil’ tidbit was one of those times for me.

Over the last few years, the world has seen many things, including the rise of grassroots fundraising and political campaigns, and actor Stephen Baldwin’s re-emergence as a born-again Christian.

Now, these two things combine, and for good measure, invoke the biblical story of Job as a framework to inspire donations to restore the wealth of the actor we used to refer to as “the blond Baldwin.” (via Andrew Sullivan’s Daily Dish)

The character of Job is used to invoke intense, all-encompassing suffering, the loss of everything that a man could hold dear. In this case, the organization and website called Restore Stephen Baldwin invokes not just the image of a suffering man, but of the community’s power to alleviate that suffering.

By offering a token gift, each community member will be able to help restore Stephen Baldwin the way Job’s community helped to restore him.

Getf@#koutofhereareyouf@$kingkiddingme?

According to the “privately funded and managed website,” the fact that Baldwin has become a voice for preaching the word of God, and because of his convictions “it has caused him the loss of many jobs and the most recently, a highly publicized bankruptcy.

He has been publicly ridiculed and insulted by people who think that he has been abandoned by God. “A simple search through the internet will reveal that people not only mock Stephen, but mock God.”

Soooo he has been forced into poverty by refusing to take acting roles he didn’t like (just like Job!), and now it’s up to the Christians of the world to save him so he can yell at people some more and still pay for soul-patch wax and pouting cream?

And why does Baldwin’s wealth need to be restored? The FAQ is glad you asked:

Q- Why does Stephen need personal wealth?
A- Stephen’s influence is in Hollywood. Hollywood worships money and without it you are seen as a loser and cannot be an effective influence to this group.

While you may or may not be sensitive to Baldwin’s image in Hollywood, one interesting thought comes as the website asks visitors to consider the potential impact of small gifts. “What if 10% of the 159 million Christians in America gave a Token Gift? What if 10% of the worlds 2 billion Christians gave a token gift?”

What if, indeed. And then next we can start tossing money at Screech, Gary Busey, Tonya Harding, Vanilla Ice and pretty much every other Surreal Life cast member/TruTV has-been’s ass.

You can also follow RestoreSB on Twitter for updates like “Why do we send missionaries to every tribe on the planet and exclude the most influential tribe of Hollywood?” – the answer is once again provided in the FAQ:

“His family does not perceive Stephen’s predicament as a matter of spiritual warfare. They see Stephen’s outspoken Christianity as poor choices therefore they will not help.”

They are also on Facebook, or pretty much any other social network one can think of, holding out their hands in an effort to help this “poor martyr”.

The website states some outlandish claims that makes be concerned about the sanity of our population and even many who have leadership roles. One of the quotes states:

“He deserves hundreds of millions for his Job-like faithfulness in the face of relentless loss and persecution.”

Hundreds of millions! Really?

If people actually donate to this cause, in this economy, that is what you call a really sad day. The fact that someone can’t find something more worthy to spend money on is eye-opening. So if you are reading this and have tons of money to donate and think that this is worth your time and money, think again.

Baldwin filed for bankruptcy in 2009 claiming to owe over $2.3 million, he obviously doesn’t have a clue what he is doing financially and most likely nothing has changed since.

Now tell me this, why would you donate to a cause involving someone who wasn’t able to pay off their $2.3 million debt when you can donate to people who ACTUALLY NEED money and are disabled and starving on the streets.

One last thing, Daniel Southern (Baldwin’s Ministry President btw), claims that Baldwin has not profited from this financially; yet the site is based on “restoring” his career and wealth. So, where are the donations going again, and who is spending the money?

I’m confused…can someone explain this all to me?

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